lots of facebook posts

Colin,
JFBConnect doesn't automatically post to a user's wall. I'm not sure what would be causing what you describe. If you can let have the user take a picture or let us know the content of the posts, that may help narrow things down... without more information though, it's tough to determine what happened.

I hope that helps explain, but if you get any more details, we'll gladly help however we can.

Thanks,
Alex

1. is there a way in their profile that they can disable the posting to their facebook? or when they post to jomsocial to choose whether it also posts to facebook?

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A user can choose not to give the "Publish Actions" permissions, which is what allows your site to post to their Facebook account on their behalf. That permission can also be disabled in their Facebook account settings for your app if they've already given it.

They can also make their JomSocial updates any non-public state, like private or friends only, which JFBConnect won't post for them.

The other option is to disable the post to networks feature in the JFBConnect -> Profiles -> JomSocial area. That will affect all users though.

2. Does a new member have to register through facebook, for it to post to their facebook profile?
JFBConnect will post status updates that the user makes to JomSocial if the following happens:
* The admin has configured JFBConnect to push updates from JomSocial to Facebook (as described above)
* The user has granted that permission to post (as described above)
* The user makes a public post, which would be publicly visible to search engines and any other viewers of your site already
If that happens, JFBConnect will also try to push the post to their Timeline.

We don't push any other content to the user's Timeline unless you've configured Open Graph Actions, which are a bit more advanced, so I'm assuming you haven't.

I hope that explains,
Alex