Patrick,
If you have those features enabled, they should show to all users whether they are logged into Facebook or not. If it doesn't show to them, you should check to see if there are any restrictions on your Page (age, geographic, etc).
Basically, if you can't view your Page on facebook.com if you aren't logged in, you won't be able to view it on your site using the widget either.
I hope that helps explain, but if you need anything else, just let us know.
Thanks,
Alex