Joe,
Very sorry for the delay in getting back to this. The first link you reference actually explains what needs to be done to modify the Full AJAX plugin to tell the social widgets to refresh themselves. I'm not sure where the code for FLAX.Html.onall is that they mention, but if they are using a system or content plugin, I'd look in their file.
If you really want to modify JFBConnect, below may help you to do so. However, please note that these changes will be erased any time you upgrade. Since we have new releases (major or bug-fix) just about every month, that could mean a lot of re-modifying code. I'd highly recommend making the change the Full AJAX people recommend in your post instead.. but if not, edit the /plugins/content/jfbccontent/jfbccontent.php file. In there, around line 279, you'll see the following:
$buttonText .= $likeText;
$buttonText .= '</div><div style="clear:left"></div>';
Add a few lines below that so it looks like:
$buttonText .= $likeText;
$buttonText .= '</div><div style="clear:left"></div>';
$buttonText .= '<script type="text/javascript">FB.XFBML.parse();gapi.plusone.go();</script>';
That *should* work, but some AJAX calls don't execute the Javascript included in them. It may be necessary to use the Full AJAX method above as that may force the calling of those 2 Javascript functions to refresh the widgets.
Definitely hope that helps, and sorry again for the delay!
Alex